68 Things My Children Will Know

So lately I’ve seen a lot of blog entries about “101 Things I Will Teach My Daughters” and other such enlightening posts. And it got me thinking: one day I’ll have kids–hopefully not for a very long time!–who will rely on me for advice. What kind of things will I tell them? That question led to a list of things that I think every parent should tell all of their kids.


So here it is: “68 Things My Children Will Know”.

  1. Don’t ever compare yourself to anyone else.
  2. You are unique. Revel in it.
  3. Love your body–lumpy, flat, curvy, scrawny. It is the one thing that is absolutely yours. 
  4. On that note, starving yourself is never the answer.
  5. Throughout your life, coffee will remain your one and true best friend–especially in college.
  6. Go to college. Even if it’s only for a short time, don’t knock it ’till you try it. Some of the best experiences you’ll ever have are at a university.
  7. Value your education.
  8. No matter what anyone tells you, it is not ok to get drunk just to fit in with the crowd.
  9. Listen to classical music. Even if not consistently, you’d be amazed the power Beethoven can have over you.
  10. Learn a second language. Use it on a person of interest. You’re welcome.
  11. Know the difference between red and white wine. Find one of each that you favor.
  12. Find at least one cardio activity that you enjoy and stick with it. I don’t care if you’re a star athlete, but you’ll thank me for this when you need to relieve stress.
  13. Eat the last slice of pizza.
  14. Always be open to trying new things.
  15. Don’t ever let someone tell you that you “can’t.”
  16. Get involved in clubs. Even if you only go to the first meeting, you won’t know you like it until you try it. It’s also a great way to make friends.
  17. Learn to play at least one musical instrument.
  18. Drink hot tea regularly.
  19. Never say “no” to more cheese. You need it.
  20. No matter what lies people may tell you, dark chocolate is delicious.
  21. Always be honest with me.
  22. Queen will be one of your favorite bands and you will know each of their greatest hits–no exceptions.
  23. Have one hobby that is solely yours. It may one day lead to your career.
  24. Refer to The Bible at times when helpful advice seems sparse. If nothing else, familiarize yourself with the book of Proverbs.
  25. Guard your heart. With that having been said, don’t be afraid to love and to love fiercely.
  26. If you have to lower your standards, they aren’t “the one.”
  27. One night stands are never ok. Sex should not be casual.
  28. You will read all of the Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and Chronicles of Narnia books. You’ll thank me later.
  29. It’s ok to want alone time ever now and then. Just don’t shut your friends and family out, because you never know when you’ll need them.
  30. Be wary of Jell-o Shots. I’ll explain when you’re older.
  31. Baking is also a superb, tasty means of relieving stress.
  32. You are expected to be able to thoroughly quote both StarWars and The Princess Bride.
  33. You should always splurge on jeans. Trust me on this.
  34. Chuck Taylor’s are a required part of your wardrobe. Own at least three pairs of them.
  35. Go to museums–of all kinds.
  36. Appreciate art.
  37. Travel at every opportunity.
  38. Know when you’ve had too much to drink.
  39. Grammar is essential. Know the difference between to, too, you’re, your, there, their, and they’re. You’ll understand later.
  40. Go dancing with your friends.
  41. There’s no shame in owning more than one dog.
  42. Not all cats are evil–just most.
  43. Appreciate the stories your elders tell you. They’re the best relics of history you’ll ever find.
  44. Always smell good.
  45. The bandwagon is boring.
  46. Never change who you are just to fit in.
  47. Being popular is overrated.
  48. No matter how well it pays or how comfortable you are, no job is worth being miserable over.
  49. It’s never your place to pass judgment upon others.
  50. Find one coffee shop that’s yours–make friends with the baristas.
  51. Cat naps do wonders.
  52. Watch more black and white films. Know that Alfred Hitchcock was a genius.
  53. Take a road trip–or several.
  54. Never turn down the chance to take a photo with your friends.
  55. I’m always right.
  56. Invest in hair products, no matter what your gender.
  57. Take the time to stop and smell the roses.
  58. It’s better to have a small group of close friends than a large group of acquaintances.
  59. Steer clear of credit cards.
  60. Though I encourage you never to start a fight, if it comes down to it, make sure they hit you first.
  61. A smile goes a long way.
  62. Carry a sharp tongue and a forgiving heart.
  63. Make time for long walks.
  64. Nothing can compare to a hot bubble bath.
  65. Don’t be afraid to sing at the top of your lunges and to dance around in your underwear. Just make sure no one is watching. 😉
  66. Diet-schmiet.
  67. Reality TV will melt your brain.
  68. Don’t choose your career path based on what either of your parents do. I could care less if you follow in my
    footsteps. The only thing that matters is that you do what makes you happy.

2 thoughts on “68 Things My Children Will Know

  1. Beware of Jell-O Shots… scary but true… Also the one about reading all the Harry Potter, LOTR and Narnia books… DEAD ON.

    All of those are words to live by… however, the last one… #65… That is probably the most important thing ever. It goes along with BE YOURSELF!

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